Rihanna Is Now The YouTube Champion

Rihanna has given Justin Bieber a Chris Brown-sized beating to become the most viewed artist on YouTube. Bieber used to be the YouTube champ, his videos getting millions of hits from the pedophiles and obese teens who make up his fan base. Rihanna’s 77 videos now have a total of 3.784 billion hits which is a couple million more than the Biebs. She also has 8.73 million subscribers to Bieber’s measly 4.9 million. But what does it really mean to have more hits on a free video player? They don’t get that much money from it and it’s hard to say whether that translates into more album sales. What it does seem to indicate is that Bieber’s days are numbered. The teen girls that flicked their bean to his lesbian hairstyle five years ago are older and less stupid now. The teen girls coming up now are much less interested in his weasel-faced looks and grating voice.

Not that Rihanna isn’t fucking annoying also, just less so. Her music appeals to a broader demographic of people with shitty musical taste than Bieber’s does. In the current world of music you have to pick which artist irritates you the least and go with that. I’ll take Jay-Z’s bragging about how much money he has over Kanye’s God complex. It doesn’t matter though. One day someone will take a video of a kitten sneezing on a puppy and it will get more hits than either of these two ass clowns combined.