Lena Dunham Fat Girl Gatekeeper

Lena Dunham is obsessed with her own every bowel movement. Filled with corn niblets and license plates as it is. You can’t pretend her narcissism is method acting anymore. Even Daniel Day Lewis doesn’t stay in character for five years. Dunham injected herself into the Amy Schumer-Glamour spat about what constitutes plus-size.

I think what Amy was really saying was just, like, let’s remove the labels, and she was just saying, like, why do you have to categorize our bodies even if it’s in the context of ‘Let’s celebrate these women who are different,’ because the fact is, every [magazine] issue should be an issue that contains a multitude of bodies and a multitude of races and a multitude of gender identities.

That magazine sounds awesome. Like a high fashion We Pals with trannies. Dunham is the most annoying kid in your college lecture hall who constantly chimes in with near-verbatim recitations of what the professor just said. They’re never questions. She restates the obvious, crosses her arms and plops back in her seat like she taught everyone a lesson.

Glamour got busted calling Schumer fat when they should’ve said non-traditional. Like the non-traditional workforce we brought over from Africa to the U.S. in the 18th and 19th centuries. Just ask her twice if she really wants butter on her popcorn. Somebody should’ve consulted passive aggressive moms. They’re good at this shit.

Photo credit: Lena Dunham / Instagram