Justin Bieber Fears Cops Will Find Embarrassing Photos on His Phone

Justin Bieber is terrified of what cops will find on his cell phone, namely naked pics and references to drug use. We told you a couple of days ago about the raid at the little lesbian ferret’s castle looking for evidence to connect him to an egging incident at a neighbor’s house. Cops took Bieb’s cell phone in order to look for pics or video of the egging incident. Apparently, the only eggs Justin is worried the cops will find are pics of his nearly shorn huevos. Because, like all narcissistic jackasses, Justin loves to admire and photograph his ripped gender-neutral body in the mirror. Being the dumbass that he is I’m also sure there are all kinds of video and pics of him doing drugs, girls, boys, his mother before she realized he reminded her of a client she had about twenty years ago. He’s afraid that some money hungry peace officer at the sheriff’s department will sell the pics to a tabloid. I would consider that a given.

This is why smart people know when it’s put away the camera time. Like when you’re doing bumps off the bare-ass of Lil Za. That shit can and will get out eventually. Then what will all the screaming girls fans and their pederastic adoring moms say about their beloved Justin? Probably not so much. When you love a douchebag, that’s a commitment that requires very selective information processing.