screw you, johnny depp

A few months ago Johnny Depp went to a steak house in Chicago with two friends and left a $4,000 tip (more). And in February he gave a long interview to CBS to help the West Memphis 3 (more). So what is Mr Wonderful up to now? Oh nothing. Just taking back our streets and then counseling the downtrodden, is all. The Sun says…

JOHNNY DEPP has rescued a pal from a mugger brandishing a broken bottle.
(Depp), 46, stepped in when British singer STEPHEN JONES was accosted for cash as the pair left a recording studio in Los Angeles. “It was an extremely scary moment. This guy looked off his head.
“Johnny looked him straight in the eyes and told him to back off.”
After Johnny intervened, the (guy) backed down.
“Johnny gave him a few bucks and told him to straighten up his life.”

Whatever. He’s not so great. I would have done the same thing as long as the criminal was white. But not if he was a minority of course because I assume they can beat me up. If I ever saw a minority walking toward me I would grab the back of my girlfriends arms and crouch behind her, shielding myself from my future-attacker. And while my girlfriend is distracted by what she assumes to be cowardice, I surprise her with some treachery as well by pushing her into the minority and yelling to him or her that my girlfriend has money in her purse.