God you suck Paltrow

There’s an auction on eBay (over here) for the Johnsons Clean Water Initiative, and even though she’s balancing doing nothing with doing nothing, Gwyneth Paltrow made time to volunteer someone else to do something.  What an angel she is.  Don’t be confused by the 5 pictures of Paltrow compared to just one of the person who is actually doing something, rest assured, Paltrow has no further obligation.

Basically you get 90 minutes with trainer Tracy Anderson, 5 additional hours with some other trainer, three workout videos, 40 minutes worth of consultation over the phone, and a $2,500 American Express gift card for travel arrangements.

It says the retail value of all this is $10,000, and it really takes some balls to claim that kind of thing.  Let’s just pretend that it somehow makes sense to turn $2500 from your bank into a $2500 gift card on the floor, and let’s pretend the dvd’s cost $150 dollars each, that means these personal training sessions are worth well over $1000 an hour.  I find that hard to believe.  Especially since this woman is Paltrows business partner, so it probably cost her nothing at all.  I don’t have a dictionary on front of me but I’m pretty sure “donate” means “to give”.