Malawi is a special place for Madonna. It's the impoverished African nation where she's purchased between three and seven of her adopted children. You can never get those shiny beads back.

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Women's magazines alone are now able to produce cliche cheesecake shots of women without fear of an enraged hashtag. They provide much needed mitigating context for the sexual objectification of women. That context being, we're women, we can't possibly... READ MORE

Premium cable television has become everything you'd hoped it could become if you were frustrated trying to beat off to the first fifty years of television. READ MORE

Irina Shayk is pregnant. Out of decorum, news outlets are refusing to state definitively that the baby belongs to Bradley Cooper who's been fucking Shayk for almost a year now. Though that decorum makes Shayk seem even sluttier. READ MORE

Barbados is celebrating its 50th year of Independence from British colonial rule. That's the day they finally told the English to leave, then promptly created four-color travel brochures reminding them how much they secretly liked fucking black chicks. READ MORE

Jennifer Aniston went on Ellen to remind everybody that she has yet another shitty looking movie coming out for Christmas. It's a low ball comedy with lots of groin jokes. She's being paid millions. She also spent most of... READ MORE

By way of disclosure, I exchanged messages with the kid who made the original "Barron Trump seems autistic" video. He's not merely a kid, he's a kid with autism himself. He panicked when Rosie O'Donnell vaulted his little anti-bullying... READ MORE

Moroccan TV seems far more practical than its American counterpart. The TV show Shabiyat aired a segment on their daytime talk show providing makeup advice to women who've been victims of domestic abuse. So like Oprah, minus the sixty... READ MORE

Somewhere in her seven million dollar settlement is a clause clearly stating Amber Heard can never publicly state Johnny Depp beat her. Whether he did or he didn't, she clearly made that suggestion in the press and to the... READ MORE

Iskra Lawrence, the less atIskra Lawrence, the less attractive British version of Ashley Graham, hit the New York City subway to explain to random people trudging to and from real jobs how far she's come in her own body... READ MORE