Madison Beer is that teen Justin Bieber signed to his sub-label at Island Records. Coincidentally, she's also got big tits and becomes street legal in six months. READ MORE

If your roommate stole your fucking Teen Vogue again and you missed Cindy Crawford interviewing her own daughter on the blessings of modeling right as your breasts are coming in, you missed the world. READ MORE

That good looking Australian hurdler who became famous in 2012 because of her body wiggling videos has been sending out revealing photos of her training in advance of her arrival in Rio. A not so hidden messages that chick... READ MORE

Bai Ling was for one shining 90's moment the go-to Chinese chick in Hollywood movies. There can be only one. There are only so many action films going ensemble enough to require Asian. That's just demographics. Get in line... READ MORE

2012 Olympic gymnast McKayla Maroney suffered an identity crisis when she quit gymnastics and everybody she met kept insisting she was "that gymnast girl". Sort of like Obama will be next year when people keep asking him, "Hey, I... READ MORE

Every four years Serena Williams ceases being a tennis player and becomes a forward display of American strength at the International Olympics. Fuck you, ISIS. Got one of these? READ MORE

Playboy Playmate credentials don't do what they used to. You're a naked lady without a country. READ MORE

Kylie Jenner turned nineteen. She colored her hair red, tied it up in cornrows, and let her unemployed black boyfriend sodomize her while chatting up his baby mama to mark the occasion. READ MORE

Taylor Swift's public relations team is frantically trying change the story from Swift bitch slapped by the Kardashians. Also zero MTV video music award nominations and being a horrible shrew who makes souvenir guitar strings from Zika babies aborted... READ MORE

Paris Hilton continues to hide from Islamic Jihadists behind the veil of a highly publicized artist in residence program at an Ibiza nightclub. If you stop pressing PLAY on that iPod, the terrorists win. READ MORE