If I was 70-years-old and on parole I wouldn’t know how to behave myself either. Life at that age after a prison sentence just becomes about drinking and seeing some titties. 

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If you ever needed a reminder that it's better to be rich and famous than not be a violent psychopath, witness the reaction to O.J. Simpson, released into the wild earlier this month after nine years in the pen.

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If you didn't know that Blac Chyna had a Dominican mom some teen years older than herself who walks around in revealing catsuits and Tweets crazy street lingo slurs, congratulations. You've contained the useless shit you know.

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When you believe you can’t beat the case, then manage to challenge the police to a televised high speed race, and still come out first place in criminal court with a not guilty verdict you’re instantly elevated to legend... READ MORE

The Goldman family was particularly peeved about O.J. Simpson being granted parole at his first shot hearing this past week. Simpson did behead their kid for hitting on his ex-wife. But perhaps nobody suffered more with the Simpson parole... READ MORE

Today's the day we find out if O.J. Simpson will be free to be glib and repetitive in second tier TV interviews for the next five years. O.J. hype is in full swing. It's like the circus came to... READ MORE

We told you about a knife that was found on O.J. Simpson’s old property in 1998 that has just now been examined after a cop took it home for nearly 20 years. It turns out there is no DNA... READ MORE

Because cops are fucked up selfish people too, an off duty cop took possession of a big-ass knife unearthed by construction workers in 1998 leveling the former Brentwood home of O.J. Simpson and never reported the knife find to... READ MORE

OJ Simpson is going on a hunger strike in a Nevada prison because he’s sad and wants to die. He’s currently serving time for a 2008 conviction for kidnapping and robbery, though he’s better remembered for slaughtering his ex-wife... READ MORE

Mr President, I know my life is coming to an end. Please, don’t let me die in prison. I feel the end coming. But I don’t want to die in prison like common jailhouse scum. O.J. always did have... READ MORE