Seeing your diminutive boyfriend going Joe Pesci on a family in a minivan has to make your loins water. The draw toward Justin Bieber’s raw animal fervor has kept Selena Gomez coming back to the boy who took her... READ MORE

Justin Bieber is one of those drunk hicks on Cops who thought he was shooting a possum that turned out to be his mildly retarded older brother, Billy. Except he’s that dumbass with $100 million in the bank. Which... READ MORE

Justin Bieber is being investigated for attempted robbery because he tried to grab a chick’s cell phone. The Shrinky Dink gangster was apparently at Dave and Buster’s with Selena Gomez on a step stool whispering in her ear about... READ MORE

Members of Justin Bieber’s posse reportedly bribed a border official to let their members with criminal records into Canada. As per Canada’s policy of being modestly boring, no cash was exchanged but the official was given a bunch of... READ MORE

Justin Bieber escaped any serious charges in his drag racing arrest from Florida last Winter by using the defense of being rich and having really important attorneys. It was a brilliant tactical maneuver. You may recall this past January... READ MORE

Justin Bieber is the global equivalent of ass cancer. But he’s got decent publicists. They set up a Facetime chat with inspirational Pakistani women’s rights activist Malala Yousafzai. What does a mincing mini-troll like Bieber have to say to... READ MORE

Floyd Mayweather said he is actually friends with Justin Bieber and not just pretending to like Justin Bieber like the rest of the people who like Justin Bieber. Mayweather was offended when it was suggested otherwise, as if him... READ MORE

The more Justin Bieber rents yachts and loads them up with strippers and booze, the more I begrudgingly have to respect the little shit weasel. If it weren’t for the trio of bloated social media assistants and handlers he... READ MORE

The guy who wrote Justin Bieber’s recent apology for Justin’s racist joke that got leaked in a video forgot to mention there might be more coming. Apparently, 14 to 15 was a trying age for Justin, when he was... READ MORE

Here’s a fact. Every white kid knows at least one racist joke. Black kids know at least two. The Spanish kids probably know tons more but I could never figure out what they were saying when they pointing at... READ MORE