When Jesus was getting his eyes eaten by birds up on the cross his greatest hope was that someday a strung out twink would hashtag his name on a whiteboard alongside a manic misspelled cult rant.

Apparently, Selena Gomez' entire family begin to shudder and shake with the mere mention of junior Napoleon who took Selena's virginity and bragged about it to his rented black rapper posse. 

I’m not sure how Justin Bieber can look Selena Gomez in the eye anymore. She had intercourse with the enemy and was handed back like the plot in an episode of a Game Of Thrones spinoff.

Justin Beiber is still going through growing pains when it comes to girls. Sure, picking which religious cult you want to belong to is easy but knowing which woman you want to throw away your bachelor eligibility on is... READ MORE

Marilyn Manson is calling out Biebs for rock culture cultural appropriation.

Nudes are the physical proof that famous people are just like us. No matter how many charts you top or records sold most people can't resist the urge of a birthday suit photoshoot.

The Hillside Church that is possessing the pop star's every move told Justin to remove all bad influences from his life. So relationships with 40-year-old illiterate millionaires who punch people for a living got tossed on the chopping block.

Some of life's most important lessons can only be learned through firsthand experience. If you look at Amy Schumer's tit, your retinas will explode. If you stand in front of a moving car, you will get run over. The latter is especially difficult... READ MORE

Now that the drama of not wowing more audiences with shitty autotuned music has settled, all eyes are back on Carl Lentz, and Bieber's new faith in Christ cults. Lentz leads the Hillsong Church - a group that has all the buzzwords of the... READ MORE

With limited zoning regulations, rivers that you could use to dissolve a body Breaking Bad style (probably a newborn girl,) working conditions that enable us to buy disintegrating Old Navy t-shirts for $3, and crime scene-resembling cuisine, China should... READ MORE