I’m starting to fear the future after seeing evidence everyday of women attempting to take the lead. Ed Sheeran accepting a “man-gagement” ring is only making things worse, not equal. Pretty soon women will start expecting sex after paying... READ MORE

Sometimes you just can’t completely remove the poor from a person. When frequenting establishments where the average meal costs close to $500 there is no reason to put salt, pepper, or ketchup on whatever you’re served. Just don’t tell... READ MORE

Ed Sheeran quit Twitter after secretly uncovering that the app is a cesspool of mental spastics and a pointless time sink. Unless you're plotting a homegrown terror attack in at a European soccer match, in which case, it's your... READ MORE

Ed Sheeran's dad is a war criminal, hence he's a tiny man with bad genes. William Wallace's kid would have made less faggoty music. Sheeran and his regressive alleles were apparently shut out of an after party at the... READ MORE

Of course I mean the doughy ginger on the right and not the other guy, who has built an empire out of tricking yokels into coughing up their money for a redneck routine that’s faker than Courtney Stodden’s tits.... READ MORE