If you're looking for a measuring stick to assess which inflated bikini model to take as your wife, consider the woman who pours water on her tits on the coldest day in Los Angeles and still maintains a smile. READ MORE

According to sources close to this Danish bikini model, she and Leonardo DiCaprio have grown quite close and are super fond of one another. According to sources close to Leonardo DiCaprio, giggles followed by "What a clueless tard... did... READ MORE

Science has yet to figure out how to cure the aging process. Stop gap measures don't seem to be gaining much ground. Look to the wealthy Bravo Housewives for the prime example of 40-something women who devote their lives... READ MORE

Somewhere in the secret documents that couch fainters believe will be driving Trump's Final Solution is a rating system for foreign chicks that either keeps them domestic or puts them on transport back to Ausland. Melania stays. READ MORE

Tracy Anderson is the tiny little L.A. based fitness guru who numerous high profile celebrity clients thank for looking amazing in dresses and bikinis well into their 30's and 40's. Anderson herself doesn't appear to have any of her... READ MORE

Who said crime doesn't pay? Not the girl making a living by reporting false crimes to re-negotiate more favorable contract terms to her music. The Billboard Women in Music Awards in December will honor Kesha with their Trailblazer Award. READ MORE

At some point every Hollywood celebrity has to spend some amount of time fucking their personal trainer. Who cares about you more than the person helping you look Instagram body ready? READ MORE

If there's one lesson to be learned in the modern economy that no candidate will ever speak it's, you're on your own. Nobody is going to give you jack shit and all the local legacy jobs are gone. Grandpa... READ MORE

Not everything was better in the old days. Good looking chicks who didn't get tapped for traditional modeling careers often straggled back to community college and dental hygienist certifications and you never got to see them mostly naked without... READ MORE

The upside of fucking Leonardo DiCpario is a rapid rise in your career prospects post-coital. The downside is every single article written about you thereafter refers to you as DiCaprio's former girlfriend before mentioning your name. READ MORE