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Kim Kardashian Says She Has, Like, Body Dysmorphia

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The ladies of the Jenndashian brothel are revelatory statement Pez dispensers as they try to salvage a show people used to watch. On the most recent episode of No One's Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Kim continues to try... READ MORE

Lily James Smells Great and Shit Around the Web

October 9, 2017 | crap around the web | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

Sexy stars in robes, boob tube nudity, and more!

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Blac Chyna’s Mom Offers to Help O.J. Unleash His Beast

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If you didn't know that Blac Chyna had a Dominican mom some teen years older than herself who walks around in revealing catsuits and Tweets crazy street lingo slurs, congratulations. You've contained the useless shit you know.

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Lisa Bloom Cashes Her Last Weinstein Check

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Lisa Bloom typically represents downtrodden women with claims against powerful men. Like fat chicks who insist Usher almost gave them herpes and demand twenty million but will take fifty grand to go away. 

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Glee Star Pleads Guilty to Kiddie Porn

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Pedophiles are going to have to come up with a hall of fame for themselves with the way they try to outdo each other. Mark Salling is looking to top Jerry Sandusky’s son this year in his contribution to... READ MORE

Internet Loving Bella Hadid’s “Dope” Shopping Trip

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Bella Hadid sounds like a Japanese sex robot struggling with a 90's slang vocabulary upgrade in a new video released by Complex Magazine. And, she probably is. While shopping for sneakers in front of the cameras, Hadid uses the word... READ MORE

Honey Boo Boo’s Sister Unsurprisingly Uses Food To Reveal Baby Gender

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Colors associated with gender are sexist if you’re a social justice warrior. You should obviously wait until your child is old enough to decide which gender of the 54 newly discovered ones they feel most comfortable identifying as.

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Miley Cyrus Tired of the Cooch

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

A psychotic woman is a loyal woman. When Miley Cyrus was not participating in the verbal terrorism that some consider singing she was stalking her way back into her fiancé Liam Hemsworth’s life.

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Brie Larson Has Seen Suffering

October 9, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Most people that claim to speak for all people tend to only have victimization stories involving themselves. It's one of those things to look for when learning how to completely discount celebrity stories of Revenant like survival in their... READ MORE

Cam Newton Can’t Believe Women Know Football

October 8, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

When a sports star drops the ball on respecting females, sponsors will quickly race to drop the offender. Not because it’s a matter of right or wrong, but because athletes are never the target demographic of the products that... READ MORE

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