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IT NEVER GOT WEIRD ENOUGH FOR ME

August 20, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Well, folks, it's been real.  But, as my father once said to me on his deathbed, you're a screwup and you'll never amount to anything.   Anyway, Brend0n will be back tomorrow, which is good news, because his posts... READ MORE

PARIS AND ADRIAN GIVE ME ANEURYSM

August 20, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

The kind of people that still like Entourage are the same kind of people that still think Paris Hilton is hot, so it's fitting that Paris is dating the Entourage guy.  According to a British rag.  I don't know... READ MORE

CUBA GOODING CAN’T SEAL THE DEAL

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Okay, so it's Sunday, and as Jesus always says, Sundays are for nursing hangovers.  As such, it's sort of a slow news day. Anyway, some really long-winded chick from NYU was apparently hanging out with Cuba Gooding Jr. (married,... READ MORE

BRITISH CHICKS ARE FUN

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

You've got to hand it to them – whatever they may lack in human-looking teeth, they make up for in bare tit and a general willingness to party. So who are these chicks?  I'm glad you asked, douchebag.  According... READ MORE

FRECKLETITS: COVERGIRL

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

The editors of Nipple-Free Playboy for Stupid People took a break from watching Entourage and put Freckletits on the cover of their 10th anniversary issue.  She hasn't been seen this fully clothed in years. Freckletits on the 10th anniversary... READ MORE

BRITNEY SPEARS – STILL GOT IT

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Weird, I was just thinking to myself, "Hey, you know what would make my hangover feel better?  Pictures of Britney Spears without hair extensions or makeup."  Thanks, God! She looks like what Sharon Stone would look like 20 years... READ MORE

LILY ALLEN MAKES LIKE PROM BABY

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Alternate caption: British people dress stupid.  Tri-nipular singer Lily Allen, who already holds a special place in my heart for being able to pronounce the word "twat" in such a way that it rhymes with "cat", further endeared herself... READ MORE

AIRBRUSHED NIPPLES SUCK

August 19, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

The Daily Mail has this and more amazing pictures of Heidi Klum, who has personally given birth to three baby Seals. I gave birth to one baby seal and my figure doesn't look anywhere near that good (I had... READ MORE

HAYDEN GETS A PARKING TICKET: UPDATE

August 18, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

As astute commenter (hee hee, ass toot) wwbd pointed out, "Next time you update with something as important as news that Hayden sun bathes naked you should definitely post it up top."  So there you go.  Congratulations, asswipe. Hayden Pedophilia... READ MORE

RICHIE BABY EXCITED TO NOT BE BASTARD

August 18, 2007 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Alternate caption: "Does this headband make me look like less of a stupid whore?" Nicole Richie and her pet monkey Joel Madden (more like Joel BAD-den) have reportedly gotten engaged.  And just months after getting knocked up and going... READ MORE

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