I can’t pronounce this chick’s name, but I know I’m ready to ace the ICE interview so I can earn her her green card. We’ve been dating since we met at the Learning Annex. She coos when I nibble... READ MORE

Why do our immigration plans never account for bringing in more good looking Russian women? If I were Obama I’d get that down home lingo back and haggle some. You give me five million non-inoculated peasants from Central America... READ MORE

Lots of people are glass is half empty on this whole Moscow making Ukraine its backwater bitch. As always, I try to look at the pollyanna rose-colored glasses side. The progression of Ukraine’s good looking women into international modeling... READ MORE