I’m sympathetic to people who were put in the spotlight against their will. That sentiment ends around their first DUI and if they haven’t killed it in an acting role they didn’t audition for yet they’re dead to me.... READ MORE

It’s a big deal when any of the Willis girls lands a gig. Rumer got herself onto Dancing with the Stars where only the top flight of irrelevant celebrities land nine times a year. ABC can’t crank that shit... READ MORE

I can’t remember which Wilis sister this is, but you put a Whip-It gun in her right hand and a 20-year old cock in her left and she’s the spitting image of her mother. Tallulah’s joined the family vocation... READ MORE

Cara Delevingne is rapid tonguing her way through disaffected young female Hollywood. I can’t remember which Willis girl Rumer is. The one who looks like Bruce, drinks like a fish, and hasn’t worked in a decade. Fuck, I can’t... READ MORE

People with too much free time will inevitably do wacky shit with their hair. It’s a nod to your soul yearning for any sliver of personal accomplishment. The rehab chicks usually go for the head shave. It’s a solid... READ MORE

I bet Taullulah Willis didn’t tell her rehab counselors her transition back to unsupervised life began with a incestuous topless mistress leather photo shoot with her sister in New York. Lindsay Lohan figured out by the third rehab that... READ MORE

Some people consider it gross that adult siblings would bathe naked together. I say it’s beautiful. Not so much the thought of two Willis she-brute jaws locked in taboo passion, that actually made me throw up a bit, but... READ MORE

Nylon Magazine held a party to celebrate young talent in Hollywood. The Willis girls are no longer young so they had to sneak into the event pretending to be teamsters dropping off the tables. The more normal jawline babies... READ MORE