Paris Hilton was of course robbed last week and thieves took, ahem, "two million dollars" in jewelry from her home after she left her front door open and then hit some clubs, but if you’re sitting there counting your... READ MORE

Oh what the fuck ever.  The LAPD says today that Paris Hilton had 2 million dollars in jewelry stolen from her house in the Hollywood Hills last night while she her dumb ass was out looking for new guys... READ MORE

Every now and then Paris Hilton wears a magical bra that makes it appear as though she has tits.  She doesn’t of course.  Paris could put her bras on backwards and they would fit just the same. Whoever is... READ MORE

Paris Hilton hosted the Pussycat Dolls at the Viper Room in Hollywood last night, and I don’t know what the hell that means but Paris still does stuff like this all the time.  And it's easy to see why. ... READ MORE

TMZ says today that a girl named Corrie Loftin, currently a contestant on Paris Hiltons reality show on MTV, also sometimes goes by the name Devin Lexen.  "Sometimes" meaning, "when she’s posing naked for Playboy".  Poor Paris.  I bet... READ MORE

Ryan Seacrest is the first to have the new single, "My BFF" by Paris Hilton.  Probably because he was the only one that asked for it.  He played it on his radio show this morning, and it's also online... READ MORE

Artist Johnny Yeo, who for some reason is not Chinese, has made a portrait of international superstar Paris Hilton, using only pictures from old porn magazines as “paint”.  Fox News says… A well-known British artist is exhibiting collage portraits... READ MORE

Can Paris Hilton even see out of that wonk eye?  I bet on the rare occasion that it does actually opens, it freaks her out, and she spends the next 5 minutes running in circles trying to escape her... READ MORE

In 2006, Paris Hilton starred in a movie called "National Lampoon's Pledge This!"  It currently ranks as the 15th worst movie of all time on IMDb.  If you somehow never even heard of this POS, you’re not alone, and... READ MORE

Paris Hilton was walking around last night with Benji Madden or Joel Madden or whichever one it is she dates, and she looked suspiciously pregnant while doing it.  So if you’re wondering if I’ve been put in charge yet,... READ MORE