December 5, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
Confucius probably said something about the zoo with no cages soon being empty. Now that social media has allowed unsolicited opinions to flow freely, the landscape of opinionated mother-in-laws has grown nearly infinite.
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November 1, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
Lena Dunham went off the board for her halloween costume and picked something mocking Donald Trump. She donned a "grabbed pussy" costume then spent four hours figuring out which angle and girdle made her look less fat, to honor...
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September 5, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
Lena Dunham has many magical powers. The preeminent is living high on the hog thanks to her fan base in approximately five of the nations 43,000 zip codes. She's Larry the Cable Guy. Different zip codes naturally.
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August 26, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
In a sign that our world is going Krypton, Lena Dunham and her Girls co-star Jemima Kirke are being paid to model lingerie. It's being labeled a Body Positive Lingerie Campaign because everything horrible has a constructive name. The...
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April 26, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
Lena Dunham known for her fierce feminism and the constant smell of wet woodland mammal that follows her like a Pig-Pen dirt cloud is ditching the United State if Donald Trump beats Hillary Clinton in November. Unlike previous celebrities...
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April 22, 2016 |
celebrity |
josh-j|
Lena Dunham has a boyfriend. All you girls feeling sorry for yourselves for being single should feel even sorrier. Dunham’s boyfriend, musician Jack Antonoff, put a ring on it. It being Dunham’s sausage finger. Stay calm. It’s not an...
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April 11, 2016 |
celebrity |
josh-j|
Lena Dunham has committed to consuming nothing but partially hydrogenated oils and barn owl hatchlings until Hillary Clinton is sworn in as the first female President. Lena and her cult like following of Upper West Side feminists and the...
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April 8, 2016 |
celebrity |
josh-j|
Lena Dunham is obsessed with her own every bowel movement. Filled with corn niblets and license plates as it is. You can’t pretend her narcissism is method acting anymore. Even Daniel Day Lewis doesn’t stay in character for five years. Dunham injected...
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March 21, 2016 |
celebrity |
Lex Jurgen|
Lena Dunham announced that she’s going to make a full recovery following ovarian cyst surgery. Reaction was mixed. Doctors went through her abdomen because there weren’t straws short enough to draw for vaginal insertion duty. Every fifth Facebook Like to Dunham’s surgery...
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March 10, 2016 |
celebrity |
josh-j|
In the wake of another post-production hit job, doughy Lena Dunham has sworn off all manipulation of her likeness saying, “I want to be able to pick my own thigh out of a lineup.” That makes her the only one....
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