Jessica Simpson's ass, Isabeli Fontana's nipples, and more!

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Birthday girl Jessica Simpson appears as an interchangeable Real Housewife in a new topless Instagram post with the caption "Kiss My Butt 36." Kiss it? I'll devour it. Kidding. Simpson's body is back on track after years of Mariah... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson is plotting her return to reality television. It was her Newlyweds MTV show with then husband Nick Lachey that turned her from junior pop star into an A-list celebrity. People love a dumb blond with big tits.... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson only seems dumb. Those giant tits in that bikini that doesn’t come close to fitting just sold her twenty million in signature bangle earrings. She wore the cutoff jeans so media outlets around the world wouldn’t even... READ MORE

There’s nothing but the headline ‘adorable’ on major media outlets regarding Jessica Simpson posting her pre-K daughter with seductive prose. It’s always adorable when mothers sexualize their children. Oh, old man, no? Depending on which music historian or urban dictionary... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson caravanned her entire freeloading family down to that resort in Cabo that puts up celebrities for free provided they pay no attention to the teeny tiny Mexican photographers lining the palm trees. Somebody’s got to sell crappy... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson launched yet another apparel line because stay at home dads and high end vodka don’t pay for themselves. She studied with the physiologists in Tibet to perfect a way to contort her legs so her legs looks... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson is married, she’s not dead. Also, buzzed not drunk. And puffy not heavy. She’s still got those magnificent tits that along with her ability to lip-synch and be from Texas made her famous fifteen years ago. Origin... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson’s one regret isn’t her gay pastor dad in black leather pants or having to lug her sister into an undeserved singing career or even the fact that consuming a single Cheetoh causes her expand to 10x girth.... READ MORE

Jessica Simpson is only 35 years old despite having recorded that one song she’s known for which you can’t think of during the formative years of the disco era. Simpson recently lost seventy pounds dropping her weight classification down... READ MORE