Driving models out into the winter cold to show off in bikinis isn’t so bad. Inventing a fake bottled water company to get chicks begging you to get half naked on the beach isn’t so bad either. The combo... READ MORE

Somebody sent me a letter claiming I’m a shill for this indecently crappy water company. Do I seem that business intelligent to you? That’s rhetorical, you judgmental fucks. I’d take the money if it were offered. Shill is just... READ MORE

After an exhaustive number of attempts, the omnicidal maniacs at this sham bottled water company have finally stumbled upon precisely the winning formula for simple mastery of the human race. Tits. I don’t even know who this chick is... READ MORE

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI READ MORE

Just because Maxim is circling the toilet bowl, doesn’t mean they didn’t help discover a few good looking girls along the way. Discover may not be the right term. We used to use that for Columbus and America before... READ MORE