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Andre Benjamin Sells Out With Integrity

December 5, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Every artist has to grapple with the concept of staying true to their art versus sullying their integrity for the highest possible dollar amount. Except Andre Benjamin from Outkast. He can do both. Benjamin has found a loophole whereby he admits to... READ MORE

Peter Jackson To Lay Off The Tolkien

December 5, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Peter Jackson won’t be making any more films based on the work of J.R. Tolkien because the Tolkien Estate won’t allow it. Tolkien’s son Christopher is in charge of licensing his dead father’s work, but is not approving anything... READ MORE

Daniel Craig Buff Ass Bond

December 5, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

It was announced Daniel Craig will be reprising his role as James Bond in a new installment called Spectre where a bunch of shit will explode and he will kick a ton of secret Commie ass. Many were skeptical when Craig... READ MORE

Iggy Azalea Defies Odds And Wins Argument

December 5, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Trashy rapper and professional Twitter troll Azealia Banks went after Iggy Azalea because most people get that itch now and then. Banks began by making the point that its weird Iggy is an albino Australian chick who thinks she is... READ MORE

Kim And Kanye Most Liked In History

December 4, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s wedding photo got 2.4 million Likes on Instagram, the most of 2014 and the most ever for a photo on Instagram. To be fair it was a slow year. Scores of retarded teens and... READ MORE

The Situation Is Desperate

December 4, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Mike Sorrentino sold the tires to his Ferrari on eBay for $9,999 dollars, probably to some dickhead Saudi businessman’s hookah hazed kid who thinks he bought the whole car. Sorrentino is scheduled to appear in court next year on... READ MORE

Russell Brand Honored As Idiot

December 4, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Russell Brand received an award for saying unnecessarily stupid shit from the Plain English Campaign, a British organization which advocates the use of normal language over complex jargon which often means nothing and confuses the dumb. Each year the... READ MORE

Michael Sam Seems to Be Stewing (VIDEO)

December 4, 2014 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

In a stunningly boring and dismissive interview, Michael Sam implied he is not on an NFL team because he is gay. When asked by an interviewer from TMZ Sports who doesn’t seem to know anything about sports if coming... READ MORE

Teresa Giudice Sues Her Lawyer

December 4, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Suing your own attorney is an exercise in futility akin to shaving your own balls or cooking your own thai food. You’re clearly out of good options. Teresa Giudice of Real Housewives of New Jersey is rolling the dice.... READ MORE

Kourtney Kardashian Nude, Pregnant, Bloated

December 3, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Kourtney Kardahian posed nude while pregnant for a magazine nobody reads because her body is beautiful according to herself. Getting out there with your ass freshly drizzled in KY is a clear ploy for attention. Covering yourself in shit... READ MORE

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