The new Fifty Shades of Grey trailer is out and predictably shitty. You may as well see this when it opens on Valentine’s Day at a matinee and get it the fuck over with. It’s going to be a thing... READ MORE

Iggy Azalea is suing the dude she used to bone for studio time because the self-titled Hefe Wine took some of her failed ebonics and put them on a CD he is selling without her consent. He claims he owns the... READ MORE

Boxing sucks. I had not idea Adrien Broner existed let alone owned a few belts. Apparently the Russians are still watching this shit while they prepare to saw off some guy’s arm for not paying his rent. Enough so... READ MORE

Gary Oldman is divorcing his fourth wife but his trophy collection remains stable. They say half of all marriages end in divorce but I wonder if twisted serial marriage guys like Oldman are skewing those statistics. Most of the married... READ MORE

Future Jihadi beheading victim and adult motion picture actress Mia Khalifa is trying to recruit players to join her beloved Florida State Seminoles football team. Khalifa herself doesn’t attend the university because the rigorous entrance standards of four General Mills... READ MORE

Emma Holten’s ex-boyfriend posted nude photos of her on the Internet, making her a victim of revenge porn, which technically describes an array of nastiness forged in the decision that an immature douchebag is the man of your dreams. Once Holten’s apparently... READ MORE

Apparently getting blacked out at noon and watching people spear each other can lead to violence. Especially when your team loses and the beers are three dollars. Your wife hates you. Take it out on the dude next to you wearing... READ MORE

Protestors in Canada interrupted Bill Cosby’s Long Winded Story Tour and started chanting “We Believe The Women.” Then they yelled ad hominems and the room became divided between people who are certain Cosby is guilty and those who know for a... READ MORE

Justin Bieber’s lawyers are threatening to sue a website comparing his teeny pre-Photoshopped dick to a real one. His Calvin Klein ad generated some attention because he looked abnormally jacked for a boy. The two photos tell conflicting stories, but... READ MORE

I want to punch the guy who created Vogue’s 73 Questions series. It features female celebrities wearing a lot of makeup, trying to act casual, and answering a series of pre-screened questions with responses that are never even accidentally interesting. It’s a... READ MORE