ASHTON KUTCHER IS A “DOUCHE”

I’m sorry to use such salty language in the headline, but those little kids are the ones who said it, not me.  Also I apologize because this is apparently not new but I somehow missed it until I heard Stern talk about it yesterday.  Anyway, as has been well documented, Ashton Kutcher has been coaching the North Hollywood Harvard-Westlake freshman football team, and brace yourself because you’re never gonna believe it, but the kids all think he’s a douche.  Star magazine says…

Coach of the year? Not quite. Ashton Kutcher has been having a ball as assistant coach to North Hollywood's Harvard-Westlake School freshman footballers. But the feeling isn’t mutual.  The kids want him gone," says an insider. "They think he doesn't know what he's talking about and can't stand his tough-guy attitude."  Out of the huddle, the kids mock their famous coach and have even given him a special nickname: Ashton Doucher!

The alternate headline for this was, Worlds Least Surprising Story.  Because of course Ashton was gonna be nothing but a poser idiot who thinks he knows something about football.  If he even knows what a stunt is, I will eat my hat.  Forget that, what are the odds he can even throw a football without looking like a total queer?  Please note the freshmen are bigger then he is in many of these pictures.  If your balls haven’t even dropped yet, and some Hollywood idiot is looking up to yell at you, you're gonna have a hard time taking that seriously.  I bet at least one of these kids even still has a teddy bear in his room somehwere, and not even he is afraid to make fun of Ashton Kutcher.

(picture source = splash news)