NO THANK YOU MA’AM

Apparently a girl named Jessica Sierra was a finalist on "American Idol" a few years ago (the year that Carrie Underwood won) but that may be a complete lie because I watched that shit and I have no memory of this chick whatsoever.  But I'll remember her now, because Tampa police say she offered oral sex to a police officer if he agreed to not arrest her for disorderly intoxication and resisting arrest.  This was after she hit a cop in the face, cursed out some doormen, got in a fight with another girl and called the cops racist names, but before she threw up in the squad car.  CBS News says:

Sierra was arrested after causing a disturbance in front of Ybor City's Full Moon Saloon around 2:10 a.m. Saturday. Police say the club bouncers called over two off-duty officers when Sierra refused to leave the bar and started yelling at them.The officers stepped in and told Sierra again to leave. According to police, once she was outside the bar, she started yelling at other bar patrons. The officers say they gave Sierra several warnings to leave, or she would be placed under arrest.That's when police say she began physically fighting on the ground with a friend who was trying to calm her down. Officers say she then started walking away from in front of the bar and doubled back, violently shoving numerous patrons on the sidewalk while yelling profanities.Officers on the scene say while they were taking her into custody, she attempted to push away and run off.She also allegedly struck one of the arresting officers in the face. Once she was in custody and on her way to booking, police say Sierra went back and forth from being combative to apologetic.Also according to police, she initiated racial slurs toward the officer, then allegedly offered sexual favors for her release. Witnesses say Sierra got sick once she was in the patrol car.She is now being charged with disorderly intoxication, resisting arrest and probation violation on charges of felony battery and cocaine possession. Back in April, Sierra was arrested for smashing a glass on the on the head of a customer at Hyde Park Cafe in Tampa.

Hollywood is a dream factory.  Just three years ago she was on the most popular show in America, a rocketship to stardom.  Now she splits time between rehab and jail.  That was better than this, but still, I see big things in her future.  And by "things", I mean "cans of frosting".