LINDSAY LOHAN HAS A GIFT

Lindsay Lohan sat down with OK magazine and did a pretty provocative interview, mostly focusing on a lecture series at Oxford she attended on the philosophy of Hegel during the period of German idealism.  Wait, no.  My bad.  I was thinking of someone who’s not a total fucking retard.  OK says

Lindsay also now seems to have perspective when she revisits those last few months before entering rehab, climaxing in her arrest for DUI and cocaine possession. "I hit rock bottom," she confesses. "Everything in my life came to a point where I had to make a decision."With her hard-partying days hopefully in her past, Lindsay has only to look to the future. "I'm here to stay," she tells OK! with conviction. "My talent is a gift and I'm going to use it."

Like bad boys running from their past in shows on the CW, I'm talented but troubled, so I kind of know what Lindsay is talking about.  Except not really.  What does she even do?  Other than have big boobs.  Which is a talent on par with having a head.  Comparing her talent to some other actresses is like comparing Stephen Hawking to that chicken who plays tic tac toe at the state fair.        (in a related story, I got an email form a guy saying he saw Lindsay at a bar Friday knocking down a long island iced tea.  Is is true, did she really do that?  Yeah sure why not.)