ISLA FISHER HAD UNPROTECTED SEX

Isla Fisher, the fiancée of Sasha Baron Cohen, is almost definitely pregnant, according to three million different news sources and most people with eyes.

The Wedding Crashers actress reportedly announced the couple's happy news in Los Angeles' the Cat and Fiddle pub. A source is quoted by the Daily Star as saying: "Isla called everyone to a toast and gushed, 'We have got good news. I am pregnant.' "

Fisher's PR flack denied the report, saying "If or when Isla becomes pregnant, she and her fiancé will decide if an announcement is necessary."  I'm guessing her rep had her eyes gouged out with a hot poker, or she lost her vision in an IED blast while serving in Iraq, because the photos from the New York premiere of The Lookout (in which she plays a stripper — hooray strippers!) where she's wearing a high-waisted (hides the stomach) black (slimming) dress with an overcoat (used for hiding body shape or shotguns) couldn't be more obvious.  The pictures of her in the black-and-white print dress, also with an empire waist (hmmm), are from the LA premiere, which happened sometime earlier.  And the pictures of her in the pink dress are from the 2006 MTV Movie Awards and aren't exactly relevant, but whatever.  What am I on trial.  You can't judge me.

In related news, impregnating redheads is awesome and a hell of a lot of fun. –MU