BRITNEY SPEARS FORGOT SOMETHING

Britney Spears looks retarded with this stupid Santa hat and sunglasses, but half of her giant rack is hanging out of her bra, so she's totally 100 percent forgiven.  Girls with big racks get a surprisingly amount of leeway.  Like, if ten of us were lined up on the edge of a lava tank filled with lava and big mean bears in lava-proof suits, and a hot topless chick with big tits went down the line and pushed the dudes in one by one, and I was tenth in line, I would still give her the benefit of the doubt.  I would still wait to see where she was going with this. Because, you know, maybe.

(so – other than amputation – what’s the secret to losing 100 pounds in a month after having two kids in one year?  Lipo?  No.  No, couldn’t be.  According to whats in her hands here and here, the answer appears to be Snickers.  Lots and lots of Snickers.)