Britney Spears is retarded

Although not technically a veterinarian, Britney Spears posted a tribute to tigers on her website yesterday, rambling incoherently on their hypnotic and mysterious presence. Behold the beauty of childlike stupidity:

“In some ways, people are a lot like animals. I’m mesmerized by tigers. Their eyes, their stripes, their constant quest for survival. They almost have a sense of mysteriousness about them. They pull you in and make it difficult to look away. They make you wonder what is behind their gaze. A sense of eerie awe comes over you in their presence. The fear they give you when you pass them is stunning. Behold the beauty of the tiger.”

This is news to me, but apparently you can’t walk 10 feet in Malibu without tripping over a tiger, and the fear they give you when you pass them is stunning. Someone might want to explain that her HDTV isn’t a window. Those cowboys and spaceships and tigers, that’s just a TV show, hun. That’s not all happening on the beach behind your house. She must have been so disappointed the time she ran outside to meet Jesus. “But he’wa jus here. Come back, Jesus, come baack!”

Source = BritneySpears.com. To see her post, click the