Madonna spent her 51st birthday in Italy this week with her 21-year-old boyfriend, whose illicit geriatric lust must have been like a fire inside as she walked around, probably shakily, with her old lady parasol. And since he has no dignity or self respect, some of his friends joined them for a swim before they slipped off together for a night of hip-breaking passion. I was totally jealous so I went and humped this and pretended it was Madonna. They’re practically twins.
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