Paula Abdul has still got it

Paula Abdul mocked the very premise of her own show last night when she lip-synched her new song on “American Idol”, and no one expects you to watch this whole clip, because that would be mean, especially since you only need to see two things to understand her idiocy:

Around the 2:20 mark, a nice young man helps her across the stage (it’s more reminiscent of what you would see in a nursing home going in the direction of the bathroom then, say, a Britney concert) and, while wearing a headset microphone, she’s starts singing into a second microphone on a stand. This has led some to assume she was lip-synching, because if you notice, the audience wasn’t blown out of their seats and pressed against the back wall which is what would have happened if her “connecting to the internet with dial-up” like voice had been boomed through two microphones.

Around 3:06, she’s crawling on her knees and then eventually kind of lumbers up to her feet and twitches for a while. If you can’t get this video to work, just imagine the silhouette of a penguin woofing down a whole fish but set to crappy music. I’m sure in her mind she’s poppin these moves at a hundred miles per hour, but in reality it looks more like a senior citizen exercise video specifically designed so you can also do it from a seated position if need be.