All the Kardashians and Jenners Canceling Their Bookstore Appearances

Lots of big shit has gone done in the wake of Kim Kardashian’s Pink Panther bandits / insurance fraud victimization in Paris. As a for instance, Kim hasn’t posted to social media in almost several hours. Her press team responded to desperate pleas from pre-diabetic sad teenaged girls chewing on their credit cards with assurances that Kim would soon return to merchandisable chunk platitudes but that right now she need time to heal. Emotional trauma can often be more profound than physical trauma, though less than sexual trauma, that she’s given or received.

Additionally, the clan of budding authors have canceled book signings for generalized fear of Serbians. Khloe Kardashian canceled the paperback launch of her book, Strong Looks Better Naked, which can’t possibly be a title that has any meaning to all but the trainable community. And the Jenner sisters withdrew from their scheduled appearance to promote, Time of the Twins: The Story of Lex and Livia, the second in the series of dystopian YA novels they pen freehand in the nail salon as a wordsmith hobby. Like the Bronte sisters if the Bronte sisters could only name three colors between them.

Crime truly does create a wave of victims, bowing out from Kim’s fat gunny sack to every member of her family and now the literary community beyond. You have to blame France. Also, people dumb enough to believe the Kardashians can write books.

_{Photo Credit: Vogue}