Rob Kardashian Eating Himself to Death

Every male in the Kardashian orbit chooses the form of his own destructor. Lamar Odom went with crack whores, Kanye with psych meds, and Bruce got tits and started sucking cock on a camper. Dead Bob kicked it off initially by simply dying. He was the last one with balls.

In a family of whorish shameless women, it’s the lone remaining dude who’s chosen food as his means of self-injury. Go figure the odds on that gender bender. Still Fat Rob Kardashian checked himself into a hospital for diabetes related health scare following a collapse into bacon cheese fries from the stress of his Blac Chyna baby mama breakup. Either that breakup stunt’s real or its faked for the cameras. Either way barely maintaining people can’t handle this kind of shit. It’s like the provocation level required for a Trump Twitter battle. It’s not high.

Rob Kardashian’s been treated numerous times before for his insulin and glucose level red alerts, something he’s supposed to be mitigating with healthy diet, exercise, and not making out of wedlock babies with fugly hookers on national television. He’s fallen short on all three doctor’s recommendations. Now, he’s going to die. I don’t mean imminently. Though I don’t not mean imminently. Be prepared. We all know dumb people are declaring 2016 the year of death.

If anybody in this idiotic porn star family cared a whit about this troubled male like character in their midst, they’d help him change his name, move far away, and work in a bookstore shelving in the self-help sections. He might live to see his stepdad die of AIDS. In Los Angeles, there’s no way he makes it to season 15 of KUWTK. As if they don’t have his funeral episode already pre-produced.

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