Oh Jesus. Lena Dunham Has Something To Say About Her Former Sexy Self

On the left: 138 pounds, complimented all day and propositioned by men and on the cover of a tabloid about diets that work. Also, sick in the tissue and in the head and subsisting only on small amounts of sugar, tons of caffeine and a purse pharmacy. On the right: 162 pounds, happy joyous & free, complimented only by people that matter for reasons that matter, subsisting on a steady flow of fun/healthy snacks and apps and entrees, strong from lifting dogs and spirits. Even this OG body positivity warrior sometimes looks at the left picture longingly, until I remember the impossible pain that brought me there and onto my proverbial knees. As I type I can feel my back fat rolling up under my shoulder blades. I lean in.

A post shared by Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) on Jul 10, 2018 at 10:34am PDT

Lena Dunham apparently thinks that at one point she was thin and desirable and “complimented all day and propositioned by men,” and is letting people know that although she is no longer her former infamously sultry, sexy, and trim self that each one of us has jacked off to a thousand times, she’s happier than ever. Dunham joins pretty much every woke celebrity alive by constantly eluding to a vague quasi-diagnosable ailment, and in talking about how ill she was at her super hot peak, she states that she was “sick in the tissue and in the head.” Yeah, my dick was sick in a tissue when I first saw her banging bod in the pic on the left. God it just makes me explode. Here’s Dunham’s full post:

On the left: 138 pounds, complimented all day and propositioned by men and on the cover of a tabloid about diets that work. Also, sick in the tissue and in the head and subsisting only on small amounts of sugar, tons of caffeine and a purse pharmacy. On the right: 162 pounds, happy joyous & free, complimented only by people that matter for reasons that matter, subsisting on a steady flow of fun/healthy snacks and apps and entrees, strong from lifting dogs and spirits. Even this OG body positivity warrior sometimes looks at the left picture longingly, until I remember the impossible pain that brought me there and onto my proverbial knees. As I type I can feel my back fat rolling up under my shoulder blades. I lean in.

Yeah, more like I want to lean into her hot pussy. Deciding which part of this defiant statement of delusional bitchiness is the most eye-roll-inducing is quite the challenge. “OG body positivity warrior?” “Complimented only by people that matter for reasons that matter?” “Complimented all day and propositioned by men?” I’ll let you guys decide after you’re done cleaning up the mess you made while looking at the pic. Yowza.

Photo Credit: Instagram, Backgrid, MGM / Getty Images