Selena Gomez – Lupus Cute Name For Big Fake Tits

Back in my day when celebrities needed to step out of the limelight for a stint in rehab or recovery after getting big new fake tits, they called it “celebrity exhaustion.” Now people are calling it “lupus.” Kids these days. At this point we pretty much all know that Selena Gomez ALLEGEDLY needed a kidney transplant after overdosing on meth she scored from Carl Lentz, ALLEGEDLY, and it looks like while she was under, Gomez got the two for one A-list overdose special by tacking on a big new fake pair of tits. ALLEGEDLY.

A new gif features Gomez leaving a building after doing fistfuls of drugs, um, allegedly, and all eyes are on her noticeably enhanced boobs that have all the bounce of two kettlebells hitting the ground. You think she’d be able to afford something a little natural more looking, but at least she splurged on getting her nipples sewn onto the actual top of her boobs. Why just be pointy when you can be horizontal. As a graduate from the Disney School of Sexiness, Gomez’ appeal to perverts was always that she looked like she was four-years-old, so it will be interesting to see how her career does now that she’s looking more like Katie Price than a nymphomaniac Dora the Explorer.

Photo Credit: Hollywoodtuna / Pacific Coast News / Backgrid USA