Britney Spears Handicapable Tit Artist

A post shared by Britney Spears (@britneyspears) on Oct 13, 2017 at 11:53am PDT

Britney Spears delivers the only funny Saturday Night Live skit I’ve seen in ten years in a new Instagram video demonstrating her surprising comedic chops. Or, she’s proving that she’s thriving with a severe mental handicap and should be applauded for knowing how to open doors. In the clip, the mud-caked gutter weave can be seen painting on a palatial-looking veranda accompanied by Mozart’s Piano Sonata 11. The ample tit visibility and belly button ring convey that while she’s obviously royalty, she hasn’t forgotten her modest, Green Acres Trailer Park roots. The camera slowly reveals what the beguiling enchantress is bringing to life with her art, and it turns out to be various patterns found on nine-year-old girls’ Limited Too rompers from the early 2000’s. The last time Spears was lucid. I want to be in whatever mental state allows one to post this Mommy And Me Paint Class abortion to social media. Must be nice. 

Chicken and waffles and Thorazine and Zoloft is a hell of a breakfast, and Spears is probably looking at something completely different on her canvas than we are. She might be looking at something that wouldn’t be painted by either an average toddler or potential murderer adult. While I like to make fun of Spears for being Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds twenty-four seven, she always seems to be having fun, and she’s maintained her bangable body, so really, who needs her to be talented or coherent? Or not braindead? Not this guy. 

^{Photo Credit: Instagram}