LaVar Ball Going for Broke (VIDEO)

LaVar Ball’s primary purpose in life is to repeat the name of his athletics wear startup, Big Baller, as often as humanly possible. It’s in every sentence he speaks, often completely out of context. If he were smarter, you might cite Asperger’s. He’s not. It’s as if his entire business acumen is based on a Marketing 101 class he sat in once to keep himself basketball eligible.

Ball went on the Colin Cowherd show on Fox Sports because Cowherd is a blowhard himself which makes him susceptible to allowing bombastic empty suit guests to sound reasonable. Cowherd’s co-host Kristine Leahy was assigned the role of bad cop in the LaVar Ball interview. She peppered the belligerent dad with questions about hurting his son by asking for a ludicrous one billion dollars in advance from shoe companies and insisting Lonzo Ball would only try out for the Lakers. Leahy clearly was trying to get under his skin. Any half-decent sports agent would’ve politely deflected because you’re on national television and what’s your other option. Ball is not half-decent at anything outside of squirting decent basketball genetics.

LaVar Ball refused to look at Leahy while she questioned him and instead he said shit like “stay in your lane”, “you’re a hater”, and “you’ll get what’s coming to you”. Worse than even a veiled threat was his judgement that she simply wasn’t Big Baller. Even if that has no literal meaning, that hurts.

Ball scoffed at the idea that he was anti-woman and pointed out the fact that he was married. His wife couldn’t confirm his kindliness because she’s not allowed to speak unless she want a visit from Mr. Back Hand. That’s Big Baller.

LaVar Ball turned down ten million in a shoe deal for his kid to sell maybe a few hundred pairs of ZO2 Big Baller shoes. So, a couple grand in sales minus the upfront cost. Let’s be generous and say fifty grand in the hole at the moment. LaVar Ball has to be giving the Lakers pause in taking Lonzo with their second pick. There’s a 95% chance that whoever you have third on your board is as talented as Ball and he doesn’t come with the world’s most insufferable sports dad. Though don’t discount the current Lakers ability to fuck themselves. The unmistakable connotation of draft lottery picks year after year is incredibly shitty management.