Golden Planned Parenthood Pins Snuck Into Oscars

Nothing says rebellious symbolism like wearing a pin so tiny you have to later on direct people to people blown up photos of the pin and explain to them the nature of the rebellion. Emma Stone and a handful of other Oscar attendees living on the bleeding edge of social action wore golden Planned Parenthood logos on their designer dresses and clutches. They were the stylish accoutrement of the evening.

Like the NFL, the Motion Picture Academy is pretty strict when it comes to game day shoutouts via wardrobe additions. There was clearly a push to cover up the cleavage this year as it was the Oscars of Lamentations. Dress like you would for a funeral. A funeral for people who get paid millions to play pretend. Blue ribbons were approved to support the ACLU. Mel Gibson’s leather Iron Cross cape was denied. 

Despite the posted rules, Emma Stone and her sisters in reproductive rights donned the camouflaged pins and entered the hallowed halls. Imagine the potential consequences of being caught. Somewhere Margaret Sanger was applauding their bravery. Also, ordering the termination of black babies. You can do both. You used to have to get your fifth abortion before you earned the golden PP pin. This kind of dilutes the prize value.

The gross wealth of the seated Oscar audience could well cover the current federal funding subsidies for Planned Parenthood, but who the fuck needs that? Yes, I could write a meaningfully large check but what about instead I wear this tiny gold pin that matches my couture? Quit giving me grief. I paid for my own abortions in high school like everybody else.