Sarah Silverman Drop Dead Titties at HFPA

After no Google alerts on her own name for a week, Sarah Silverman found the lowest cut dress she could find and showed up to the Hollywood Foreign Press Association event enticing drunk Turkish men to assault her in front of a TMZ camera. It was that or a Bush hates abortion song on the street corner. Whatever breast meat Ariel Winter tossed into the trash, Silverman picked up and packed into her own new rack. Ponce de Leon wept when he discovered the Fountain of Youth was just a sitz bath spa for old Jews in South Florida. Silverman is being more pro-active. Like building a time machine and going back to not break up with Jimmy Kimmel. There is a Plan B. You’re looking right at them.

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