ESPN Takes a Month to Perfect Its Lie

Everybody with an IQ above Kardashian understands why ESPN picked Caitlin Jenner to receive the Arthur Ashe Courage Award at the ESPY’s. It’s the same reason you told that girl in high school with the big tits how smart and funny she was. Why dance around the base human desire for sex and money? It’s normal. Apologize like you mean it, take your ratings boost, and move on. Back in June at the announcement, ESPN issued a statement that ‘the decisions speaks for itself’. Yes, it did. We get it.

With the ESPY’s coming around this week, ESPN rolled out Maura Mandt, the only chick they could find who works in ESPN executive ranks, surrounded by a team of public relations consultants, to double down on their cheating husband level excuses:

I think Caitlyn’s decision to publicly come out as a transgender woman and live as Caitlyn Jenner displayed enormous courage and self-acceptance. Bruce Jenner could have easily gone off into the sunset as this American hero and never have dealt with this publicly. Doing so took enormous courage. He was one of the greatest athletes of our time. That is what the Arthur Ashe Courage Award is about, somebody from the athletic community who has done something that transcends sport. One of the biggest platforms the Arthur Ashe Foundation has is educational, and I think in this choice we have the opportunity to educate people about this issue and hopefully change and possibly save some lives.  I think that is why it was the right choice.

Was a clairvoyant not available to confirm that Arthur Ashe approved of this nomination from beyond the grave? I could have written that pat response in two minutes, and even dropped in how Bruce Jenner bravely called 911 after he killed that old lady on PCH. Would Caitlin Jenner have done that? I don’t know. I know Caitlin Jenner never won the decathlon and her contributions to saving lives have been limited primarily to going to swank parties on terraces where everybody pretends not to notice her man hands. Every little bit helps. Excuse me, miss, your cock is showing. Yes, that does qualify you for the Pat Tillman Award.

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