Miley Cyrus And Stella Maxwell Still Figuring Out Lesbo

Bruce Jenner spent sixty years planning his coming out dress. It’s not so easy with twenty-something Hollywood girls suddenly hearing voices from Jesus and their publicists that they’re lesbians. Do I go full on Cholo pants and flannels? Wife beater and Norm from This Old House construction belts? If Beverly Hills was ever begging for a new store, it’d be a trendy designer shop for celebrities to go Sapphic chic without fully committing to dyke. Gina Gershon, open this shit up.

Miley Cyrus and her erstwhile lesbian lingerie model girlfriend hit L.A. over the weekend looking like total newbies. Kristen Stewart had a leg up on the reverse drag by mentoring under a real butch personal assistant slash girlfriend. These two knuckleheads look like they pulled out a 1970’s View Master wheel on the Lesbian Culture in Some American Cities and started copying. I get it. There are no genders or restrictions on who can love who. Now, release the rubber toy vag-on-vag sex tapes or I call bullshit. If you’re not fucking, you’re just playing dress up.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI