Kim Kardashian Looks to the Future (VIDEO)

Somebody at Glamour had the bright idea of trying to make Kim Kardashian look thoughtful. Close your eyes for a moment and think of adjectives that describe Kim Kardashian. Let me know when you get to ‘thoughtful’. I just rolled past semen-covered and confused and I’m still not even in the neighborhood of thoughtful.

The video editors perched Kardashian awkwardly with a fake laptop bouncing on her hummer knees as she wrote a letter to her future self in 2025. Just look at those occasionally timed gazes into the distance. She’s really cooking. Most people when challenged with this inane self-help exercise tell their future self not to knock up their current crazy fuck girlfriend or take time to watch more shows about dwarfs on TLC or some such shit. Kim mostly asked her future self if she was still a vapid fame whore popular on social media and if science had figured out a way to make her ass look enormous, but less like Baby Huey in a diaper. Then she closed the letter and told herself not to open it until 2025, presumably unaware that hiding a letter from herself she’d just written makes no sense. Unless Kanye hits her in the head often enough. I’m not rooting for it, but it would make her 2025 more exciting.