Playboy Centerfold Derailed Ronaldo

Mexico has it’s own version of Playboy which is geared toward the Latin market meaning the chicks aren’t too tall to intimidate bus boys and show their tits for ten cents on the dollar. Daniella Chavez has appeared on the cover and lists that as her second biggest accomplishment outside of repeatedly fucking soccer ball kicker Cristiano Ronaldo. This was during the time Ronaldo was dating Russian model Irinia Shayk and was widely rumored to fuck anything that moved, the same instincts which led him to endlessly chase down the soccer ball and become the most famous guy in the world nobody has heard of at Buffalo Wild Wings. Chavez may be a home wrecker but she’s really proud of it. This is the worst case scenario when you bang a floozy on the road. Ronaldo just threw his laptop across the penthouse suite:

“Cristiano was very shy at first, but when he built up his confidence was quite a man, though still a bit fearful. He loved me, but the idea was not to show it. I just wanted to fulfil a dream and have sex with him. I love his body. [Cristiano liked] my face, my breasts and the fact that he had never slept with a Playmate.”

I’m not much for reading between the lines but it seems like he put his P in her V. Ronaldo’s relationship is now finished but if he spends over five minutes crying on the pillow I’d advise he call the laundry boy to promptly arrive and bitch slap him. You’ve got your pick of the litter. Seek out a nice girl with no working knowledge of cell phones. Or just keep porking Chavez she seems to be game. Since when does Real Madrid play outside of Reno?

Photo Credit: Instagram