The Situation Closes Shop

Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino posted an old ass photo of himself at his tanning salon just hours before the salon was shut down because landlords expect rent money. The past year was rough for The Situation, who has a massive tax evasion case pending, got charged with assaulting his brother, and was often recognized on the street as being himself. Things got so bad he had to sell the wheels to his car and start waxing his own balls. I’m not sure what his message is. I never owned a tanning salon, yet I never had one stripped from me in disgrace either. I’d call it a wash. He should be back on top in no time after he completely erases any record of his existence, gets plastic surgery and moves to Cuba where he’ll spend the rest of his days as the coolest bartender at the neighborhood bowling alley. Others have faired much worse. Sweet caramel hued milfs and all the embargoed Tecate you can handle. Salud.

Photo Credit: Twitter