The Bachelor Almost Got Interesting

Network television is inherently uninteresting because it lacks tits and swearing and grotesque violence and the other things that form the basic hierarchy of interesting viewing. Contestant Ashley on the Bachelor touted her virgin status then took off her bikini top to prove that she can both lie and follow producer instructions. The goal of the show is to become marketable enough to sell a diet powder when the series ends or if you’re lucky, become the second wife of an NFL player until your untimely death. I’ve never understood the allure of staged reality shows. I like real. I like fake. I don’t see the value of fake real. If my girlfriend is reading this, you don’t need to pretend. I don’t care that much. Let’s not get caught up in who’s getting what and when. It’ll all even out when you find a better boyfriend.

Photo Credit: ABC