Bachelor Chick Gets Hammered

Some idiot named Jordan Branch got black out drunk on The Bachelor and is blaming the show’s producers. It’s commonly known that reality show producers get participants drunk so they will act like sluts and assholes. That’s the foundation of reality television. It’s the bar at 3am. Else everyone would discover their last ounce of self-respect and go home. Being convinced to do embarrassing shit on national TV requires frat initiation volumes of drink. Also, Branch brought her own whiskey as a stunt and gave it to The Bachelor. Pretty sure the producers didn’t tell you to do that.

Branch claims she told the producers she had a problem holding her liquor prior to taping but they ignored her because they rightfully treat their contestants like stupid cattle. Branch is advocating for a chaperone be present on set who would cut people off when they’ve had too much to drink. Sophisticated tactics like that should happen around the same time people stop appearing on a TV show to find a spouse. You’re not the first or the last. Go underground for a few weeks and change your hair.

Photo Credit: ABC