Patriots Fans Underestimated

Potential jurors in the Aaron Hernandez conviction cake walk were handed a questionnaire which contains the following:

Are you a fan of the New England Patriots? Have you ever attended a Patriots game? Is there anything about [Hernandez playing for the Patriots] that would impair your ability to be fair and impartial?

Essentially, they’re looking for people who won’t be missed from work or home for the next four months and who live in New England but have never attended a Patriots game or even consider themselves a Patriots fan. You’ve got your winner’s circle of the populace right there. Now factor in your not being familiar with last year’s biggest regional news story and the only people left to judge are n’er do wells who want to write a shitty book which you’re allowed to do about six months after the trial is over. Of course hardcore Patriots fans are more likely to acquit Hernandez. He probably hasn’t smoked angel dust in months and can still play behind Gronk. Look for a mistrial and in about five years time if you see a guy who looks like Aaron Hernandez in your favorite bar, change favorite bars.