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November 4, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston | 0 Comments
Suge Knight passed out and fell down twice while in jail causing injury to himself because his head is giant and weighted down with thoughts of revenge. Knight is either unable to come up with $75,000 dollars in bail for his recent paparazzi camera stealing arrest or just wants you to think that so he can shank some inmate who didn’t cover the spread in Super Bowl XXVI. After being shot again at Chris Brown’s MTV Awards pre-party, Knight is on blood thinners because of an uncovered clot in his lung which may or may not be concentrated evil or an alien. He was apparently unable to take the meds in jail because so many people who work in the penal system want him to die really badly. Knight will most likely live to be hundreds of years old before expiring. Several millennium later his remains will be unearthed by James Cameron’s avatar and future humans will start disappearing once again in the music industry.