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October 1, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments
The best thing about these inane Parisian fashion shows is seeing tons and tons of half-naked models. That and the fresh baguettes and the discounted admission fees to the French Museum of Epic Surrenders. Also the saucy river whores will snuff out their cigarettes before rim jobs if you speak just enough French to say tar irritates my rectum. But mostly it’s the tits.
Miranda Kerr was under the press gun in Paris because Justin Bieber who she might have let finger her snatch at an after party was roaming around Paris with Selena Gomez, who her ex-husband fucked for Shakespearean style revenge. There was also that nerd fight at Cannes between Justin and Orlando that ended when each side produced a doctor’s note showing they suffer from low muscle tone. It’s like high school band drama, except everybody’s got professionals helping them hide their acne. Miranda immediately changed the subject by wearing a super revealing dress. Nice tits mean you never have to raise your voice.
Photo Credit: Splash