Octomom Cops A Plea

Nadya Suleman pleaded no contest to welfare fraud after she failed to disclose her porn income in her statement of financial need to the government. She apparently made twenty-five thousand dollars for masturbating in a bathtub, which was screened at leading Eastern European gynecological conventions in the name of the gothic sciences. Suleman received 200 hours of community service, but if she just wants to get her tubes tied and watch Maury while her kids fling poo on the walls, that should be permitted. Twenty-five thousand divided by fourteen children doesn’t even buy the infestation soccer pads. Suleman better step up her porn game. She will probably drop a few pounds walking down the highway and picking up trash while her kids sit unattended learning how to cook meth and steal your car. It just seems like somebody should’ve been put to death in this case.

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