Madonna Ruined Game Of Thrones And Jesus

A very well-respected and honored member of the Jewish religion, Madonna showed off her appreciation for the costume party angle of Purim by posting a shot of her dressed as Daenerys from Game of Thrones on Instagram yesterday. Get it? Because Madonna thinks that she’s a queen, and Daenerys is a queen, and even though Madonna is 29 years older than Emilia Clarke, who has probably slept with several thousand fewer men, the race for which of them is sexier is clearly neck and neck since Madonna is so youthful and attractive all these years later. She also posted a photo of her and a man wearing a Jesus mask, because you know that she’s had sex with a guy who was dressed like Jesus at least a few hundred times, just so she can truly believe that she raw dogged the son of God. I also included the picture of Madonna licking her shower glass because everyone should start off their Monday by feeling sick.